The Unconventional Guide to a Queer Valentine’s Day

Maybe you’re feeling like this Valentine’s Day should be renamed Singles Awareness Day, or maybe, just maybe, you’ve got a special someone.
If you do, here’s a mini-guide to sidestepping the heart-shaped madness, and opting for something low-key AWESOME.


Buy her nothing


Who are we kidding? A celebration of love is all well and good, but the bottom line is, Valentine’s Day is a money-making venture. Fuck that shit!

Sure, you can show how much you’ve been paying attention by buying her that ONE thing, but how’s about dropping things out of the equation altogether and creating an experience or a feeling instead?

It takes a little more work, but that’s how you can really show how tuned in you are.


Leave gendered courtship out of it


Whether we like it or not, many of us have been raised on Disney romance. We’re all well versed in the gendered roles of courtship; the chocolates-and-flowers, the high-heels-and-lingerie, the “Oh no, I’ll pay for this” gallantry. And the thing is, these codes run deep even in queer couples.

In the words of Taylor Swift, why not try to “shake it off” this year? Think outside of the box. It’s surprisingly difficult, but so worth it, because as a great friend of mine said (no, not Taylor Swift) strict gender roles within a relationship ruin “your experience of loving and being loved (…) because someone sees you as an idea before they see you as an individual.”


Surprise yourself


You know what? We’re all fuckin’ scared. Being open and revealed and vulnerable can be petrifying. And rather than launch into a heartfelt paragraph about how vulnerability is your greatest strength, I’ll rather hide behind trending expressions that occasionally work for me:

#YOLO people! #LiveYourBestLife!


Take the pressure off



Does all of this make your hands go clammy with sweat? Do you feel like you’ve only got this one shot to make that grand gesture?

Well chill the fuck out!

‘Cause every day should be Valentine’s Day 🙂




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